A National Scandal: American Mothers March to Defend Motherhood and Children’s Human Rights

Mothers of Lost Children march from the U.S. Capitol to the White House in Washington DC to protest children being taken from safe mothers and given to battering or sexually abusive fathers through family courts.  This governmental cover up is similar to Penn State and the Catholic Church cover-ups. Mothers will protest at the Department of Justice and Demand Equal Rights for Women and Protection in Courts across America for whistle blowers who have the right to Defend Childhood.  Mothers are bringing attention to child trafficking in the Courts, and  States Judges who fail to Protect.  Help us send a mother from each state to represent the rights of mothers and abused children.

 Mothers March on Washington DC to end Child trafficking through the courts

October 1 – 2, 2014  Mothers of Lost Children demonstration and Lobby Day in Washington D.C.

California – Napa, Historical “Broken” Courthouse 12 pm

OCTOBER IS VIOLENCE IN THE FAMILY AWARENESS MONTH, Mothers of Lost Children (Mothers who have lost custody after reporting abuse)- bring attention to children of Domestic Violence.  October 1st is recognized as the National Safe Child Day.  Throughout the month communities across America will be participating in a campaign to bring attention to this National Scandal – Child Trafficking. We invite Mothers and Supporters from across the nation to join us in making the Safety of Our Children a National Priority.

To commemorate the National Safe Child Day- Mothers across the Nation will Protest  at Courthouses, State Capitals and the White house.  Delivering the message A Nurtured Childhood is Endangered, Declaring that we must make Safety the first Priority in US child custody Policies.

Vote like a mother-Mothers of Lost ChildrenHeal Mothers FlyerBring back our Girls and Boys

Vote like a mother-Mothers of Lost Children




WHAT DOESN’T KILL ME documentary about Mothers losing Custody in the USA

Domestic violence: to stay or to go? Why do US courts favor the abusive father in custody cases?

Mothers of Lost Children is so happy to announce that our Friend Rachel Meyrick has launched her Crowdrise to finish a very important film:

WHAT DOESN’T KILL ME – documentary feature film

This campaign is to raise funds to complete a world-changing feature documentary film about domestic violence in the US.

What doesn’t kill me is a film about domestic violence in the US.  Our heroine is 87 year old Charlotta Harrison who after 60 years of marriage divorced her husband after his final violent attack in a supermarket and she is now an advocate for survivors of domestic violence. We also meet other women, some who have lost their children through the courts to the abusive father, a typical outcome if a protective mother goes up against her ex partner in a child custody case.  We meet the incredible children that have found creative and shocking ways to escape their abusive fathers. Stories that inspire and opinions that will change the way we see each other.

Help Charlotta tell her story and benefit women across America and the world.

Clearly domestic violence does not just affect women, men are frequently victims.  In this documentary I have actively chosen to concentrate exclusively on mothers who have children, it is the outcome of the children that concerns me the most as they have no voice.  

We all have a right to family life without violence.

Click here to view the trailer:


Several Months back Rachel Meyrick a UK film maker contacted us and asked if we were interested in talking about the subject of Domestic Violence and Custody issues…..little did Rachel know how big a story this really was.  Rachel had the beginning of a wonderful film and had plans to return to the United States to complete more interviews. The timing was great; among the notables Rachel interviewed Phyliss Chesler, Evan Stark and Jennifer Collins from Courageous Kids Network and Mothers of Lost Children at the White House in Washington D.C. on the National Safe Child Day.

(Rachel Meyrick, and Director of Photography on my last US trip, Laura Mcgann, here she is with me filming at the White House in Washington DC:)


“Rachel Meyrick is an inspirational documentary maker who is committed to raising awareness about domestic violence, its impact and the court processes that should protect those who experience it via a new documentary. The film will show the devastating impact of domestic violence, open public dialogue about it by giving voice to those who experience it and to the professionals who support them. No one who watches the documentary will fail to be affected. ”   Ruth Jones OBE
Charlotta, the main ‘Character; in the story,  spends a lot of there time talking with victims of domestic violence and is well aware of the power her story has on others and therefore is desperately keen to see this film out in the world telling her story and raising awareness. From her own experience Charlotta is very aware of the affect of domestic violence on children and shockingly:

Courts are handing the custody of children to their abusive fathers in THE MAJORITY of cases in which the father challenges the protective mother for custody (SOURCE: National Network to End Domestic Violence, NNEDV)

Amongst (many) other factors, abused women are being blamed,  seen as valueless humans; the abuser is seen as the calm and solvent parent, even when there is evidence of sexual abuse to the children.

These children have no control, no voice and no ability to change their circumstances, this film will begin to change that and your donation will make that happen.

The way to stop domestic violence is through education and awareness.  This film will promote awareness.  It will initiate discussions with you, your friends, politicians, judges, police, schools, prisons, colleges and so on and so on…., which is how change begins.

We can all be part of this change – my part is to finish this film and craft it beautifully so that it can reach the widest audience possible and be taken seriously, your part is to support the film, watch the film and encourage others to do the same.

Interviews with leading experts during the film will shed light on how we move forward to stop domestic violence.  There are solutions, there is a way forward, we can have hope and this film can lead the way.


Ruth Jones OBE, Charlotta and Rachel Meyrick What Doesn’t Kill Me – Documentary film about Domestic Violence and Mothers losing custody to Abusive Men

We all have a right to family life without violence.

 Join Mothers who have lost custody in Domestic Violence Divorces finish this film and educate the Nation-


 What doesn’t kill me can be a narrative to tell your story.  We are so grateful to Rachel for helping us to dispel the myth:  mothers and children lie about abuse/mothers get custody after divorce.  Please, share the trailer and help us get the conversation started and help Rachel complete her mission.  Use this in your communities to bring attention to the Family Court Crisis.  One idea is to host an event talk to the DV centers.  Libraries can offer venues, or churches.  One idea among many – Invite friends and community leaders to a Mama Bear Event.  Show the trailer tell a story pass out materials such as this Mama Bear Effect info partner with a Darkness 2 Light facilitator and materials.  This amazing project by Boston University- Ignorance Is,  Ignorance is irresponsible  Ignorance is inconceivable   The price of Justice  Battered mothers stories.  There are many wonderful Authors who’s work will also support you as you become the facilitator of the new story, turning this event into a trans-formative experience.  



Dear Rachel, Charlotta, Laura, and all involved in creating this film,

Thank you so much for including Mothers of Lost Children and Courageous Kids in your filming. It was a pleasure. We are so grateful for the opportunity to work with you and spread the word on this important subject. You are a G-d send!
Melissa Barnett

Mothers of Lost Children

A missing son turns 18 and a mothers love


Robin Karr’s son Matthew turns 18th!


 “The only love that I really believe in is a mother’s love for her children.” – Karl Lagerfeld

My precious son Matthew is 18 today. I cannot believe my baby son is now a young man.

  • Although he’s been “missing” from my life since November 1998, he’s been in all my thoughts today. Turning 18 is such an important milestone and one I would give anything to share with him.


  • Of course, my heart is something beyond broken – especially today. I’d give my life just to hear my son’s voice. I can only imagine what it would be like to hug him and tell him how much I love him. How much I’ve missed him…


I’m hoping with all that’s in me that my silent prayers for a mother and child reunion will be answered and Matthew will contact me. I believe miracles still happen and broken hearts can become brand new.
I love you so much Matthew. I’m reaching out to you. Please reach back…
Dear Robin and Matthew –
Our greatest wish for you is that you are able to find each other now.  The past cannot be undone, the injustice and the pain can not be removed but we pray that a mother and child reunion will happen for you both and the brothers will be together soon.  We pray for a healing in your family and that Matthew has the help he needs and strength to reach you.   Matthew,  you are not alone, this has happened to many children and there mothers and you can heal and be together again.  Your mother loves you so much and has been waiting for you.  There are several ways on facebook, through the websites and we will pass messages as well through this website and facebook.   http://motherswithoutcustodyworld.com/https://www.facebook.com/pages/Motherhood-Interrupted/514634451972237http://www.pinterest.com/robinkarr31/motherhood-interrupted/http://www.courageouskids.net/

Please share this page –  it is our hope that Matthew will see this post and he will know how much his mother loves him and misses him. We pray he can reach out to her for that hug they both need so much.

Robin Karr’s son Matthew http://motherswithoutcustodyworld.com/

National Organization for Men Against Sexism on Child Custody



A Request to Men’s Organizations and Allies for Support of Protective Child Custody

(with Spanish & French Translations)


From the NOMAS Child Custody Task Group

Male supremacist groups (“Father’s Rights”) have caused unspeakable harm to our country and to our children by encouraging abusive fathers, often with little past involvement with their children, to seek custody as a tactic to pressure a mother to return or to punish her for leaving. “Shared parenting”, “friendly parent”, involvement of both parents and other concepts that seem fair and benevolent have instead been used to manipulate courts and legislatures to help abusive fathers. For instance, women are routinely denied custody of their children after being classified as “unfriendly” for asserting that the husband has abused them or their children.

Parental Alienation Syndrome (sometimes disguised by use of other names for the discredited practice) is an unscientific theory that is used to prevent investigation of children’s reports of their father’s abuse. Unscrupulous professionals use it as a way to make money while ignoring the destructive impact on children’s lives. Male supremacists debase the discussion of child custody issues by personal attacks and attempts to substitute repeated lies for information based on scientific research. NOMAS condemns the male supremacist tactics and instead supports the work of protective mothers to make safety of children the highest priority of custody courts.

Male supremacists do not speak for the vast majority of men and fathers. We invite organizations of men opposed to men’s violence against women and exploitation of children to join us in speaking out in support of protective mothers and for reforms in the custody court system so that children will no longer be sent to live with abusers or separated from safe, protective mothers.

Spanish Version:

Resolución de la Organización de Hombres contra el Sexismo (The National Organization for Men Against Sexism) de EEUU.

“En nuestra reciente reunión de invierno, la Organización de Hombres contra el Sexismo (NOMAS por sus siglas en inglés: The National Organization for Men Against Sexism) aprobó una resolución para apoyar a las madres protectoras. Pedimos a otras organizaciones de hombres (igualitarios) que se unan a nosotros para que podamos desafiar a los “grupos supremacistas masculinos” (ej. asociaciones de padres separados) y, en particular, para cuestionar su afirmación según la cual dicen representar a todos los hombres y a todos los padres varones. La Organización Una Llamada a los Hombres (A Call to Men) ha estado de acuerdo en apoyar esta resolución. Si alguien conoce otras organizaciones de hombres (igualitarios) que puedan estar interesadas, por favor remítanles la resolución que aparece más abajo que también pueden encontrar en www.NOMAS.org.
Barry Goldstein, NOMAS Chid Custody Task Group

Los grupos supremacistas masculinos (“grupos por los Derechos del Padre”) han causado un daño atroz a nuestro país y a nuestros niños animando a padres maltratadores/abusadores, a menudo con un escaso pasado de interés en el ejercicio de la paternidad, a solicitar la custodia como una táctica para presionar a la madre a volver con él o para castigarla por haberle abandonado. La Custodia Compartida, el Progenitor Amistoso, la Coparentalidad y otros conceptos que parecen justos y benévolos, sin embargo están siendo utilizados para manipular a los juzgados y los legisladores para ayudar a padres maltratadores/abusadores. Por ejemplo, con frecuencia se está denegando a las mujeres la custodia de sus hijos después de ser calificadas de “no amistosas” por afirmar que el padre las había maltratado/abusado a ellas o a sus hijos.

El Síndrome de Alienación Parental (a veces disfrazado usando otros nombres debido al descrédito de su práctica) es una teoría acientífica que se está usando para prevenir la investigación de los testimonios de niños sobre el maltrato/abuso que ha ejercido su padre sobre ellos. Profesionales sin escrúpulos lo usan como una forma de hacer dinero mientras ignoran su impacto destructivo en la vida de los niños. Los supremacistas masculinos corrompen el debate sobre los temas de custodia de menores con ataques personales y con intentos de substituir con mentiras repetidas información basada en investigaciones científicas. NOMAS condena las tácticas de los supremacistas masculinos, en cambio apoya el trabajo de las madres protectoras por hacer de la seguridad de sus hijos la máxima prioridad de los juzgados que abordan las custodias.

Los supremacistas masculinos no hablan en nombre de la mayoría de los hombres ni de los padres. Invitamos a las organizaciones de hombres que se oponen a la violencia masculina contra las mujeres y a la explotación de niños, a que se unan a nosotros pronunciándose en voz alta apoyando a las madres protectoras y pidiendo reformas en el sistema judicial que trata el tema de las custodias con el fin de que no envíen a estos niños a vivir con maltratadores/abusadores ni que sean separados de sus madres protectoras y seguras.

French Translation:

Requête aux groupes d’hommes et à leurs allié-es d’appuyer une politique de garde protective d’enfants

Des groupes masculinistes (dits des “Droits du Père”) ont infligé des préjudices indicibles à notre pays et à nos enfants en encourageant des pères agresseurs, qui s’étaient souvent très peu impliqués auprès de leurs enfants jusque alors, à en réclamer la garde comme tactique pour persuader une mère de revenir à la maison ou pour la punir de partir.

La “garde partagée”, le “parent le mieux disposé”, l’implication des deux parents et d’autres notions qui semblent équitables et bienveillantes ont, au contraire, servi à manipuler tribunaux et assemblées législatives en appui aux pères agresseurs. Ainsi, des femmes se voient couramment refuser la garde de leurs enfants aujourd’hui, après avoir été désignées “hostiles” pour avoir témoigné de violences infligées par le mari à elles ou à leurs enfants.
Le “syndrome d’aliénation parentale” (parfois déguisé sous d’autres noms puisque cette notion est de plus en plus discréditée) est une théorie sans valeur scientifique, utilisée pour entraver toute enquête sur des signalements par les enfants de violences infligées par leur père. Des professionnel-les sans scrupules utilisent cette notion pour s’enrichir, sans tenir compte de son impact destructif sur les vies d’enfants. Les masculinistes font dérailler toute discussion sur les enjeux liés à la garde d’enfants en se livrant à des attaques personnelles et à des tentatives de remplacer par des mensonges répétés toute information fondée sur des bases scientifiques. La National Organization for Men Against Sexism condamne les tactiques masculinistes et appuie le travail des mères protectrices qui tentent de faire prioriser par les tribunaux de la famille la sécurité de leurs enfants.

Les masculinistes ne parlent pas au nom de la vaste majorité des hommes et des pères. Nous invitons à se joindre à nous les organisations d’hommes opposés à la violence masculine anti-femmes, afin de prendre parti pour les mères protectrices et pour des réformes de l’appareil judiciaire qui veilleront à ce que des enfants ne soient plus envoyé-es vivre avec leurs agresseurs ou séparé-es de mères protectrices sécuritaires



American Court fails mother who now seeks Justice in France

 The Telegram, the info you everywhereCornwall. Nelly, never without her daughter


Nelly never without my daughter

Nelly never without my daughter 2

Nelly never without my daughter 3

Nelly never without my daughter 4

Nelly never without my daughter 5



Cornwall. Nelly, never without her daughter

© Le Télégramme – Plus d’information sur http://www.letelegramme.fr/bretagne/enfance-nelly-jamais-sans-sa-fille-27-05-2014-10184147.php

Nelly and her daughter is currently staying in South Finistère, in the mother’s family. “I gave up my job at the UN, now I want to live here in Britain,” says mom .. BS Photo Nelly and his 9 year old daughter begin to write a new page in their lives, in Cornwall. The mother was charged with international child abduction, the girl threatened with a return to his American father, she feared. The Court of Appeal of Rennes in their favor in a case that could set a precedent. There is a grave risk that the return of the child to the United States exposed to a mental or physical danger or the place otherwise, in an intolerable situation. Therefore it is appropriate, pursuant to Article 13 of the Convention on the Civil Aspects of abduction International Child refuse to order the return of the child . “This finding of the judgment of the Court of Appeal of Rennes April 22 resonated as a “liberation” for Nelly, 44, and her daughter, 9 years old. The output of a long tunnel of eight years punctuated “unbearable physical and psychological abuse” of grueling judicial episodes in the United States and in France. First complaint while the baby is 18 months old Everything had started as a “American Dream” for Nelly, when the holder of a British aggregation, she flew in 1998 for New York, conduct research as part of a Master of American Jewish literature. She became a translator at the UN and French freelance for newspapers. The September 11 attacks in 2001, US intervention in Iraq in 2003 … The daily L’Humanité him “control a series of portraits of singers protesters.” Meetings, and a thunderbolt. One of them is revealed “extremely charismatic and seductive, I am quickly falling in love.” Nelly and the father of her daughter together, but even before the birth of the child , in March 2005, their relationship deteriorates. This is the beginning “physical violence and psychological pressure.” First complaint when the baby is eighteen months. The couple separated in late 2006, provides for shared custody, in 2007, 20 days per month in the mother, who lives in Manhattan, and ten days in the father, located in Queens. “From May to June, I notice odd behavior in her daughter does not want to go to his father, is hiding in the closet, that he refuses to put the layers. At Christmas 2007, she said she has a sore inside his “moon” and more specific things which belong to sexual abuse, “says Nelly. “I saw her suffer,” This is the gear. Mother and child in distress. Especially since the new girlfriend’s ex-husband shows up, over time, too brutal in respect of the child . “She was nice at first, horrible at the end. She shook me, hit me. They told me that it was mom who put my head that I was sad with them, “expresses the schoolgirl. “The services of child protection and justice disagreed, obsessed with parental alienation syndrome, I believe that my daughter instrumentalisais. I saw her suffer, I could not sleep, I was in all my statements, “recalls the forty. “With, in addition, several charges against me in 2013, $ 250,000 of legal fees (I had to sell my apartment). The situation seemed hopeless, like a downward spiral, “recalls Nelly. Threat of suicide She returned to France in the summer of 2013, and back to get her daughter to New York in late July. Towards a small town in southern Finistère, where the maternal grandparents are installed. The girl confided in a frame whose health service accompanies teenagers in Cornwall. He made ​​a report to the prosecutor of the Republic of Quimper (five more to follow), advises specialized consultations. It means that the girl threatened to commit suicide if he returned to his father. The prosecutor asked that mother and daughter remain in France until treatment alerts. The father alerted, seized a family court of Rennes, on behalf of the Hague Convention on international child abduction and gets the same time, an arrest warrant against the mother, in the State of New York . “A child genuine and mature ” In December, Rennes judge orders the return of the child to the United States. Nelly appealed. Students CE2 is heard by the Court of Appeal on March 26, 2014. The judges have heard tell “a child genuine, spontaneous and mature forcefully expressing his refusal to go live with his father denies him the right to express his feelings. ” His point of view was corroborated by testimony from New York (nanny, psy …) is finally considered. The appellate court noted that “the child expresses longstanding and repeated way to work with children his discomfort with her ​​father without that we can reduce this expression to maternal manipulation “. Its judgment of 22 April reveals novel in light of similar precedents call consulted at. Thirty past fifteen years, much favorable returns under the Hague Convention. This decision opened for Nelly and his daughter a new page in their lives. The father has four months to appeal to the Supreme Court.

© Le Télégramme – Plus d’information sur http://www.letelegramme.fr/bretagne/enfance-nelly-jamais-sans-sa-fille-27-05-2014-10184147.php

Shared Parenting the Trojan Horse

The Trojan Horse: Shared Custody helping Abusers get custody

Father’s Rights 101 and Why can’t we be friends by Janie McQueen are a must read! All hail Ms. McQueen!, Author and Divorce Gamesmanship Expert who breaks down the issues surrounding the custody war and tactics of the extreme fatherhood initiative. The cloak and dagger of this Extremist Hate Group  is using a new vehicle, the film Divorce Corp. and the thrust of they’re campaign is a mission to sell shared custody.  This ad in North Dakota supporting Measure 6 clever, using a child to sell the message, notice the supporters.  This clever tool is helping to educate the public while introducing legislation and public policies on custody.  They want mothers to believe it’s the courts versus us, and shifting away from Fathers vs Mothers.  These Divorce Corp folks want you to believe that men suffer equally.  They want you to believe this fraud rather than see the truth that the system which has been designed to dismantle mothers in custody hearings was created by them to reward the bully and make lawyers rich.  With the help of this lobbying group called the fatherhood initiative they have acquired Billions in federal funds to fuel these unjust, and inhumane court proceedings that violates state and federal policies.  This has become the State vs Motherhood, instigated by abusive entitled men, making children collateral damage and restoring the patriarchal rule in America.  The Trojan Horse revealed.

The State courts have become a  profitable political machine fueled by greedy lawyers and abusive litigants.   Court professionals have gotten behind ‘Super Dad’, rewarding the appearance of fatherly devotion, and why not?  Mothers and Fathers are equal, right? He can provide for the children. Let’s not forget all the federal funding and fraternal devotion. With this Health and Human Services funding earmarked to help fathers continue contact with children, court services works to the detriment of the ‘good mother’.  Inside this Trojan horse called ‘shared parenting’ are the winning strategies, that work to find mother’s unfit,  and win the war.

In Phyllis Chesler books on this subject she memorialized these events with several titles on the subject of the ‘good enough Mother’ losing Custody to violent men. Controlling men who see escaping women as something to capture or destroy.  While entitled fathers abscond with the children, hopped up on the belief that they have the right to ownership, the well oiled machine of the fatherhood industry created court policies and psycho babble used in litigation to assist and cover up the crimes of these dangerous men. Some  men use the court to devastate financially and emotionally to the extent that the women have no choice but to give up and go back,  but if the non-offending mother dares to fight back or the children disclose abuse, it’s bye, bye mommy.

Recently, Janie investigated the reasons why mothers were supporting Shared Parenting, the film Divorce Corp and mothers and advocates who are getting on board the ‘gender neutral train’.

In “Why Can’t We Be Friends?” - “[T]he more we legitimize their forums and films by attending and listening, and half-supporting and narrowly endorsing, and dropping in to see what’s up, and treating them like we’re related in some way, and Facebook friending them and generally playing both sides, the more confused and messed up this will become. And it’s already plenty messed up.”

Janie, went on to ask in an an email, she says ‘Old School” -

[T]his weekend I ventured outside the touchy-feely-friendly world of Facebook and asked some people outright, old school, via email on Saturday night, why they are taking a role, even a supporting role, in a film with a clear Fathers’ Rights and mandatory shared parenting agenda, and/or the conference it has spawned.

I wrote this note to five people who either are engaged to appear at a Fathers’ Rights conference next weekend, or otherwise have good things to say about the FR film Divorce Corp.

“I’m doing a story on advocacy for mothers and children, versus advocates for the fathers’ movement. I’m questioning why some of the former advocates for the moms and kids that shared parenting has failed, are supporting Divorce Corp, an FR film and their sponsors. It doesn’t seem to me to be gray issue, but quite black and white.

Are you in support of shared parenting? I don’t want PR, I just want to understand why some of the people whom the BMCC and others felt were their advocates, now seem to be toeing the other line, and/or playing both sides.”

…Either you Like it, or you don’t. Either you are Friends or you are not. Isn’t there some other film that tells the whole truth, that our advocates can support? Because in Divorce Corp, I see pure Fathers’ Rights propaganda shoddily hidden behind the Family Courts issues all parents face. It’s a total front.”

We ponder theses questions as well, Can you support a portion of something and not the whole shebang?  It’s a small pool relatively we are in, some 20% of Divorce cases fall into the categories of Domestic Violence Divorce called: High Conflict (same % as Sociopaths in society).  These clever blokes who are charming, and very convincing.  Hard to resist for desperate mothers who need help.  When we started on facebook we were very careful, we were dealing with abusive fr groups and mothers groups,  and once you are friends with someone who is friends with someone, (and many FR’s hide behind women’s skirts) after a while you give up.  Sadly, the mothers so traumatized, can be bullies with big egos, spread rumors if you don’t agree with them.  It’s all confusing.  Glad Janie is trying to flush this out.

Some organizations have chosen to concentrate on rights of children to take the gender pressure off, and hairpin trigger of abusive father rights extremists. It also allows them to receive funding that otherwise would not be available to a mothers organization addressing Domestic Violence and protection for children (no federal motherhood funding).  There are also advocates who are not mothers and as paid professionals do not see the harm that is being done by joining the shared parenting and neutral gender campaign.  In the beginning some mothers chose boycotting as an answer to the premier showings of this film. Some have used it as opportunity to educate the public with op-eds, showing up and sharing stories and bringing attention to the real problem and propaganda by  showing the film  “No Way Out But One“, the Holly Collins Story.

We agree joining them is not the answer.  one mother responded with, “Deconstructing the mess so that lawmakers, advocates, and the pubic at large understands the issues is hard enough. IF they would identify the fact that SOME fathers are abusive AND that MOST victims are telling the truth, they might actually support protective parents, men and women alike. BUT since they don’t… all they do is identify there is a bunch of money being made off of people who can’t afford to lose.”  Frankly, you would have to hold me down, I can’t be nice about it anymore, either.  I get that some people think education is the answer,  That’s how I approach most problems.  Educate, Educate, Educate.  I’m a teacher and I will always approach issues with varied strategies, with stories, examples and statistics. I never give up, but we are often dealing with B Cluster Personalities and there is no convincing them.  Truth, you can not educate people with a closed mind set on false beliefs.  This false belief is very rewarding, financially and professionally. It’s  Carrot or a Stick that is going to improve the outcomes for children and their mothers.  We need to hold Judges accountable, train young professionals, audit courts and federal programs while incentivizing trauma informed, child centered custody programs. For true child protection and humane treatment of children we must dismantle CPS and rethink the fostercare system.

The ‘Bureau of Misinformation and Deception’ is well at work and emphasized in this recent film and on websites about father’s rights. Myths about the custody of children still abound. Most people still believe that the courts favor mothers over fathers, that fathers are discriminated against in the Family Courts because they are men and that this is how it’s always been. Specifically, the myth that custody decisions invariably favor women needs to be challenged. The secondary training of Judges and Lawyers  continue to defraud the courts with false allegations and PAS, designed to shift blame on to the reporting party (most often mother), putting children in danger and robbing mothers of their access to Justice. The public needs to know the truth , but these folks at the table know exactly what they are doing. There may be a few ignorant or arrogant folks coerced into going along, not knowing the underlying truth. Majority do know, lawyers and professionals fanning the fire for increased billable hours, pecuniary interest.  Follow the money.

“The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing. Edmund Burke”  Any film or organization that is gender neutral on issues of abuse are feeding the beast.

While they break down the money laundering and financial scheme well, and the tactics to bilk Americans of every dime while destroy America families.  This is where we separate, money is not necessarily the great equalizer: while men and women can get on the same page on this issue of ‘scorched earth litigation‘ , lawyer driven, devastatingly costly and emotionally exhausting, there are some gender issues.  Women make up 70% of pro se litigants in Family courts with incomes unequal to men,  while Judges refuse family code 2030 which states that the court shall level the playing field. This failure to provide protection for ones rights in a Pay to play court has a predictable outcome. Access to justice is clear  - Women lose custody to men who file for full custody 70% of the time.  Further, income of the parents in the Best interest standard is an indicator for custody.

I too had a conversation via emails about the Seat at the Table, a concept I feel strongly about.  I disagreed as well with ‘this chair’ that is hardly open, I noticed that the roster of speakers had few women 4 to be exact (don’t know if that changed) out of 30 participants and wondered if more women could shift the thinking or if they will be the same gatekeepers we often encounter in women supporting the patriarchy.  I have great respect for these women but this is My response to wanting to change ‘their minds’,

“All of us getting on the same page about the money issue and funding isn’t enough”-

“Good Fathers do not file for full custody when the mother is fit and attached to the child. Trying to convince these men who are fearful, angry, and punishing who are going for the money (and the jugular) despite the adverse effects on children can not be educated at the table.  We need policies to control litigants and attorneys who use the courts to continue abuse from marriage through divorce court and protection for parents who report abuse in good faith. We need courts to uphold protective orders and DV codes and better understanding of Domestic Violence Divorces.”

How do you share custody with an abuser?  With so many judges giving shared custody to the batterer or identified molester,  how do you now share custody with the rapist…How do you friendly parent when your child begs you not to send them?  and if you protest you are now an Unfriendly Parent giving yet another reason to take custody from the mother.

“Forcibly taking a mother’s children, and then controlling her emotionally by withholding contact must be publicly recognized as one of the greatest forms of ‘mis-use’ of the American justice system and one of the greatest hidden vehicles for wide-spread socially approved physical and emotional abuse and control.” Coral Anika Theil 

It was clear from the beginning what the Divorce Corp agenda was, by using William Farrell and Glenn Sachs to report about false allegations in the film, they tipped their hand.  Divorce Corp and Shared parenting is dangerous fatherhood propaganda. They failed to mention that if issues of domestic violence, child sexual abuse, or child physical abuse are brought up in court, typically results in a loss of custody and/or visitation for the parent trying to protect their child from abuse. Legitimate child abuse victims are routinely being handed over to their perpetrators in record numbers. While False Allegations are made in these cases 2-5% of the time, the perpetrator is believed 98% of the time to be not guilty.  These cases often result in the protective and non offending parent losing custody and all contact and the child is left alone with the identified perpetrator.

For many of us who live in states with 50/50 presumed in custody, we want you to know that it does little to protect the rights of mothers and the bond with children.  A father fighting for full custody will win custody 70% of the time.  In these Domestic Violence Divorces they win 85% of the time regardless of the mountain of evidence and common sense. Abusive men disregard or have no understanding or empathy for the needs of children and court professionals are looking the other way for profit.  For the sociopath removing a child from an attached mother holds no weight with them, other than the  joy derived from the pain it will cause the mother.

The flood gates were opened with the removal of the Tender years doctrine replaced by The Best Interest Standard- a father friendly program with a  Carrot…increased custody time for lower child support.   What we need is to protect the relationship between the attached parent child bond for the health and welfare of the developing human child, and protection for their safety.

We need child friendly policies that are trauma informed in family law that acknowledges pre-separation parent child time and Why she left.  Uphold family codes that protect victims of Domestic Violence.  Custody courts should be overseen by people with education and understanding in the areas of child development and family violence.

The carrot or the stick….Daniel Sanders in a report to Justice in 2012 addressed the issue of gender neutrality being a Trojan horse, by ignoring the truth about Domestic Violence we fail to protect Women and children of Divorce.  At the heart of these issues is the mistrained and Biased professionals that fails to provide access to justice.  Preferring to disbelieve women and children this institutional bias against single mothers keeps the power of the family in the hands of Dangerous fathers. Failing to provide protection for mothers and their children is the result of the archaic institutional patriarchal rule. It is connected politically to why we pay fathers higher wages and create programs to return fathers to the family to address children and poverty.  Dr. Sanders recommended incentives to State Family Courts to improve the outcomes for Mothers and Children of Domestic Violence Divorces.  We also recommend fair and equalizing programs including fair wages and equal access to funding for single mothers.

We all know good fathers who have been screwed by the system, and with empathy we can be compassionate and understanding, these men are sacrifices to a patriarchal system and provide the cover for the true intent, Screw the Bitch.  Screw the Bitch.jpg

In a fair court concerned about the needs of children,  and all things being equal than good enough fathers would not get full custody of children over attached good enough mothers, and dangerous parents should not have access to children.

The idea that a father’s pain is equal to that of a mothers or of more value is inconceivable.  No man could feel the same pain as a mother who gave birth to a child they are now fighting to protect and retain contact with. 

The strategies in Domestic Violence Divorces should be considered hate crimes which are being committed in secret courts across America.  This ‘terrorizing of women and children’ should be addressed under domestic policies as war crimes and recognized by the United States President and Congress who have declared war on Iraq, Iran and Afghanistan for these same crimes.  Where’s our Geneva Convention?  and United States Senators who signed a resolution to bring children back who were kidnapped in Uganda… Shame on you!  How many times must we come to Washington begging, pleading, demanding that you  help our children trafficked through the courts and held ransom? Until women have an equal voice under the law, and stand together to demand our rights we will continue to be violated and our children taken and tortured.

It is our mission to bring public awareness to the fact that children who report abuse, particularly incest, are regularly given into the custody or unsupervised visitation of their identified perpetrators. Children are being trafficked through the courts.  Mothers who strive to protect their children are commonly removed partially or completely from their children’s lives.  Some 58,000 Child victims a year are taken from safe mothers and placed with known perpetrators. http://www.leadershipcouncil.org/1/med/PR3.html 

Thanks for breaking this down Janie and asking why?  I hope Janie asks next, ” Why are you calling it Parental Alienation?” and helping the FR’s?  When this is what they falsely accused you of, now you are alienated from your children as a result of the fraud upon the court.  Mother’s alienated from their children are helping to legitimize their claims.  We must call it what it is, a Hate Crime.  To take a child from a mother and brainwash them. We are Mothers alienated from our children. Falsely accused mothers who are being tortured along with our children. We can call it Maternal Deprivation, Maternal Alienation, anything but help them legitimize their false claims.

We need to face it women and children are prey and the coercive controllers and predictors are working it!  They change the names of their groups but their plan remains the same.  I have asked this question before, what have they done for you lately?  If you believe they care about mothers, show me the money!  Wake up ladies, you are being manipulated into joining the other side and while you wait around for the crumbs, their well oiled propaganda machine gets bigger and stronger.  Where is my Motherhood.gov?

Hypocrisy can afford to be magnificent in its promises, for never intending to go beyond promise, it costs nothing.



Janie McQueen is a career journalist and author of four books, most recently Hanging On By My Fingernails: Surviving the New Divorce Gamesmanship, and How a Scratch Can Land You in Jail. She writes for www.hopeafterdivorce.org, www.LAFamily.com, and www.FamilyShare.com. She is also considered an expert on juvenile literature, as the author of The Magic Bookshelf.

Fathers’ Rights 101: A Few Pages From My Book

by JMcQueen

I call this “Fathers’ Rights 101″ because it was MY 101. It was and is the yardstick by which I measure what I see going on in the Fathers’ Rights movement, and it shook me so when I started learning about it, that I’ve never wavered from my conviction that FR and anything connected to it is already rotten, no matter how many layers of frosting and rewording and flashy fireworks are applied. I thought I’d reprint it in the case you or someone else might be moved by it too.

Excerpt from Hanging On By My Fingernails: Surviving the New Divorce Gamesmanship, and How a Scratch Can Land You in Jail by Janie McQueen, copyright 2012


Another scenario is that when domestic violence moved from the social realm to the criminal—and, therefore, legal—arena, men may have recognized they had a distinct advantage: They usually had more resources to fight. This not only involved money, but support from other men ranging from those in high places, to other fathers who shared the same issues. “Fathers’ rights” organizations, which originally emerged in the 1970s, began gaining strength in the 1980s with more pro-female legislation, and now ironically wield real power in response to VAWA.

Two pillars of the fathers’ rights platform are the concept of “shared parenting,” and the intense crusade to lower child support. Shared parenting, or joint custody, is a collaborative agreement in which the care of the children is equal (or at least more equal than a normal primary-custody arrangement, in which the child lives with one parent and has visitation with the other). A shared parenting arrangement between the biological parents follows a plan to which both parents agree. While a shared parenting plan does not prohibit child support, the implication is there may be a lesser amount assigned if the child spends time with each parent more equally.

Kim Gandy, former President of the National Organization for Women (NOW) has contended “presumptive joint custody” only furthers the extent to which an abuser can continue to exploit. “It creates an unparalleled opportunity for belligerent former spouses to carry on their personal agendas or vendettas through the children—and with the blessing of the courts,” she said in an article by former Michigan NOW President Gloria Woods. “Attorneys often referred to it jokingly as the `lawyer protection act’ because repeated trips to court over minor issues kept the fees rolling in, and the mothers were more likely to suffer.”

The fathers’ rights movement is arguably the strongest force working against VAWA and related laws designed to protect women. We are not referring to fathers like Steven who fight for custody because they need to protect their children, and truly believe they will thrive better in their father’s care. We are talking about a bullying “man versus bitch” mentality, in which the man wants the divorce and all the spoils (or to share fewer of the spoils, whether it is with his ex-wife or his children from the marriage). The fathers’ rights organizations claim they simply seek a way to try to get the courts to more evenly consider a custody case, and “not always defer to the mother.” They argue that historically, courts did not view each situation in the true best interest of the child.

Regardless of whether this is true or not, the fathers’ rights movement has become a militant movement. Men are coached publicly on using the most malicious tactics possible to accomplish what seem like sinister goals: to remove or at least significantly reduce their financial obligations to their children, and return to positions of power, not only in their current lives but with their ex-wives.

Author Lundy Bancroft says the problem is more pernicious than just the existence and influence of the fathers’ rights groups. “Abusers are more and more getting fed by these father supremacy organizations, the whole father supremacy movement which calls itself the father’s rights movement,” he told us. “Let’s call it what it is.”

He goes a step further in typifying these men. “These guys are very, very obvious male supremacists when you read their stuff.”

We read their stuff:

From fathersrights.org Free Aggressive Tactics Page:


“When you stand up for your rights (including custody), spouses who think they can run over you, and take your kids, house and money, suddenly face the possibility that they may lose custody and be required to pay child support. Suddenly they become more reasonable. Do not begin settlement negotiations by being reasonable. Demand everything just like she does! In negotiations you can only compromise down. If your first offer is reasonable, where do you go from there? If you do not ask for sole custody several of the tactics in this book will not be as effective. ALWAYS file for custody, even in support matters.” ________________________________________

To Read more - http://janiemcqueen.com/fathers-rights-101-a-few-pages-from-my-book/

CA Family Court Must Review Judge Healy’s cases after reprimand from Commission

solano county protest
The Reporter- The State Commission on Judicial Performance meted out one of its rare public admonishments Wednesday, November 5th, 2014, to Solano County Superior Court Judge Daniel Healy for comments he made in a number of family law cases he presided over in 2012 and 2013.
  • “The commission determined to issue this public admonishment in view of the number of incidents of misconduct, the judge’s apparent lack of insight into the impropriety of his treatment of litigants, and the negative impact of the misconduct on the judicial system,” the commission stated in its public release, adding that the vote of the commission was a unanimous 10-0.


    This disciplinary matter concerns Judge Daniel J. Healy, a judge of the Solano
    County Superior Court. Judge Healy and his attorney, Harlan B. Watkins of Murphy
    Pearson Bradley & Feeney, appeared before the commission on October 15, 2014, to
    object to the imposition of a public admonishment, pursuant to rule 116 of the Rules of
    the Commission on Judicial Performance. http://cjp.ca.gov/res/docs/public_admon/Healy_Pub_Adm_11-05-14.pdf
  •  “Improper judicial demeanor impacts the fairness of judicial proceedings and
    respect for the judicial institution, and “[t]he canons’ insistence on appropriate judicial
    demeanor rests on the idea that such demeanor is one of those things that is central to the appearance and reality of fairness and impartiality injudicial proceedings.”
Omitted from the announcement on Wednesday was the most egregious of the complaints from victims of Domestic Violence and Child Abuse who have been court-watching and reporting to the Commission on Judicial Performance, State Representatives, CEO and Presiding Judges in Solano County.  The articles that have generated from this announcement have failed to address “the Misconduct”.  The fact that this Judge is Dangerous and has been under scrutiny from local activists working on behalf of children since he rotated into Family Court.  In 2014, Jennifer Green launched a recall event that raise thousands of signatures to remove Judge Healy.
Not only did Judge Healy violate Judicial Cannons by acting in a dishonorable way violating decorum, making ugly comments he also threatened litigants and violated rules of law.  One litigant who was in pro se was told to, “stop talking and if you continue I will have the bailiff shoot you.  I have the power to do that”
The taskforce that regularly did court-watch and protests experienced the bias Judge Healy has against minorities and especially women in Domestic Violence Divorces.
  • In Jennifer Green/Otero’s case he violated California’s Family Code 3044[1]  which states: Upon a finding by the court that a party seeking custody of a child has perpetrated domestic violence against the other party seeking custody of the child or against the child or the child’s siblings within the previous five years, there is a rebuttable presumption that an award of sole or joint physical or legal custody of a child to a person who has perpetrated domestic violence is detrimental to the best interest of the child.  This presumption may only be rebutted by a preponderance of the evidence.”

The code also specifically states that the perpetrator of domestic violence cannot use the argument that it is in the best interest of the child to have frequent and continuing contact with both parents.

The Green case was transferred to his court and without moving papers Judge Healy ordered the parties to court and he removed the protective orders that provided safety for Jennifer and her girls.  Judge Healy was not neutral in the case of the Green Girls; he investigated the case, gave direction to the Minors Attorney and Father, and spoke regularly with the District Attorney’s office and CPS.
The Commission on Judicial Performance received hundreds of complaints over the last two year regarding these cases, and while we are thrilled they responded publicly to these errors on the part of Judge Healy, they failed to provide protection for the victims of abuse and minorities who’s due process has been violated.  (could we expect more from Judges and appointees, who are considered “the fox guarding the hen house?”)
With this official reprimanded of Judge Daniel Healy by the Commission on Judicial Performance, we are demanding the immediate review of all of his cases including Jennifer Green/Otero and her three girls, and charges dropped against Jennifer that stemmed from this failure to protect, which necessitated her response, as she was trying to protect her children from further abuse.
We believe that Judge Daniel Healy used his personal bias in the case of Jennifer Green, and as a result of his false beliefs and lack of training and accountability, Judge Healy violated the civil rights of Jennifer Green and placed the children in danger.  Solano County should move to restore Jennifer’s Parental Rights and send her girls home.
  • Please help us with these action items to save three little girls -
 Please write to Solano County DA Krishna Abramas and request that charges against Jennifer Otero (Green) be dropped and an apology issued due to the charges being a result of a Judge’s court order who was admonished for his behavior.  Judge Healy was biased against women and children who report abuse.  He punished Jennifer for leaving a Domestic Violence Divorce and further punished her children for their bravery.
Solano County DA Krishna Abramas
Phone:(707) 784-6800
Fax:(707) 784-7986
Hours: Lobby Hours: 8:00 a.m. – 4:00 p.m.
675 Texas Street, Suite 4500
Fairfield CA 94533-6340
Now that the world knows that Judge Daniel J Healy is an unethical Judge we feel all his cases should be reviewed. He has caused so much suffering to innocent children and their protective parents. These children have a right to be safe. Please contact the CEO of Solano County Court and demand they review all Healy’s cases for the protection of children.  Let’s start with the providing protection for the Green Girls.

Brian K. Taylor
Court Executive Officer
Hall of Justice
600 Union Avenue
Fairfield, CA 94533
(707) 207-7370
Kamala Harris
Attorney General’s Office
California Department of Justice
Attn: Public Inquiry Department
P.O. Box 944255
Sacramento CA 94244
Jennifer and girls lovexo

Save Jennifer’s Girls 

on facebook - https://www.facebook.com/HelpTheGreens

Jennifer Green a victim of Domestic Violence, in 2009,  left her ex due to physical violence perpetrated against her children (two daughters ages 5 and 3, she was pregnant with a third) and herself. She had a restraining order against him until 10/2010. In 10/2010 her ex molested our middle daughter (4 at the time). Thereafter, the father was only allowed supervised visitation with their daughters. In 9/2011, her ex stopped exercising his right to visit the children and he pled guilty to methamphetamine possession.

In 12/2010, Solano County Social Services substantiated the sexual abuse and found that their daughters were truthful about the abuse and that Jennifer had been fully cooperative and proactive in ensuring the health and safety of the girls. The Concord Police Department’s report, spanning 10/2010- 5/2011, outlines the investigation of the sexual and physical abuse perpetrated by her ex against the girls.
In 2012, a new family law judge. In 4/2012, despite the substantiated abuse, this judge , Daniel Healy, ordered unsupervised visits between the dangerous fathers and the girls. In May 2012 the father physically abused the oldest daughter (7 at the time) and left visible injuries and marks on her. The oldest daughter also reported that her father sexually abused her younger sister (only 2 years old at the time). Jennifer reported this abuse, and in response the judge ordered that Jennifer hand over custody of their daughters to the fathers for an entire summer of unsupervised visitation.Out of fear for the safety of her daughters, Jennifer refused to hand them over and was arrested.    Jennifer has been dealing with the criminal court system who filed charges against her for trying to protect her daughters.  The three little girls are with a father who has repeatedly sexually and physically abused them and has an untreated methamphetamine addiction.  Judge Healy refused to allow Jennifer to see or talk to her children for the first year and a half.  Jennifer is now on Supervised Visitation and travels twice a month to San Diego to visit her children in a court approved visitation center, Euphemistically called Kiddie Jail.
Please pray for my children to be safe and home soon. 
Jennifer Green 

In open court Judge Daniel Healy said that a child could not be believed because she possibly could have PDD-Nos. PDD-Nos is on the Autism Spectrum. Judge Healy determined that a child with PDD-Nos did not know reality from truth so could not be trusted when giving a statement regarding abuse. According to Judge Healy it’s OK to abuse a child as long as they could possibly be disabled or if the only witness is disabled. Anyone who thinks this is wrong should write congress, the DA etc. All children deserve love and protection regardless of a disability.



Dangerous Harold LeFlamme still representing children in Orange County

~ Parents Seeking grand jury indictment against children’s attorney Harold LaFlamme ~

The Superior Court of California, County of Orange

The Lamoreaux INjustice Center, 341 The City Drive Orange, California, 92868

           Harold LaFlamme implicated in covering up abuse in Lexi Dillon Case

Why do the authorities refuse to remove Harold LaFlamme?  With evidence of misconduct, and failure to protect, the Orange County Court of California continue to employ this dangerous attorney.  Prayer Vigil for Children Trafficked through the courts in California


We recommend you file complaints with the Bar Association, Executive of the Courts and file a Grand Jury Complaint.

Too many children and families are suffering from our nationwide epidemic of court ordered child abuse by the very system that is designed to protect and advocate for them. It is our duty as parents and as a society to come together and stand united and to be the “voice” for our children by breaking the silence and the cycle of abuse.

Prayer Vigil for Children Trafficked through the courts in California

 Lexi Dillon


Activists Hold Prayer Vigil for Lexi Dillon and Jonah Rief in Orange County

by: Stand Up Orange County Coalition  from  Friday, Oct. 31, 2014 at 2:32 PM

Southern Californians fed up with the trafficking of American children through the California Courts held a protest and prayer vigil outside the Lawmoreaux Justice Center

~ Parents Seeking grand jury indictment against children’s attorney Harold LaFlamme ~

Bring Lexi Home! A video created to help you understand the danger that Lexi is in.  There is a pandemic of child abusers getting custody when children credibly report child sexual abuse. Lexi is a little girl from Orange County who has consistently stated her father is sexually abusing her. Multiple court appointed psychiatrists and psychologists, medical doctors, teachers and police officers have repeatedly reported the abuse to CPS, who turned a blind eye. We need your help to Bring Lexi Home. Please share this video, and sign the petition  http://www.savelexi.com/petition.php to help us save Lexi.

https://www.youtube.com/watch feature=youtu.be&v=f21F79cR7ug&app=desktop


Fed up parents and civil rights activists want to know why 58,000 children are turned over by judges to molesters every year and why thousands of American children are being sex trafficked out of the country.  Lamoreaux judges turned Lexi Dillon over to a foreigner whom the Tustin police cast reports showed sodomized and raped the girl repeatedly. The foreigner is no longer allowed in the U.S. and due to a lifting of the travel ban on Lexi, as far as anyone knows, neither is she. The alleged molester only has citizenship in Thailand, the site of considerable sex trafficking. Those who have looked for Lexi have been unable to find the child on the American continent. Some parents are particularly angry about the fact that minor’s counsels, normally paid by abusers, routinely fail to act in the interests of the children and instead appear to take their marching orders from the abusers, themselves.  Especially under fire is John Cate, who encouraged the foreign trafficking of Lexi Dillon and refused to take any action to protect the interests of the child who is now nine years old.
  • Massive fear surrounds the trafficking of Jonah Rief to Australia via the San Diego courts. A man who is not the father and who did not have to prove paternity was allowed to take Jonah Rief to Australia and he did so using a falsified passport calling the “Rief” boy “Sullivan.” Alabama had issued a protective order against Brian Sullivan on behalf of the child and on behalf of the mother Tammy Rief after Sullivan or someone associated with him uploaded misleading YouTube videos appearing to be aimed at getting people to kidnap Jonah from his Alabama home. California chose not to respect the jurisdictional orders of the court in Alabama, which was Jonah Rief’s home state. Jonah entered Australia with Sullivan on February 26, 2013 and disappeared. Nude photos that appeared on March 4, 2013, on the Facebook page of Sullivan’s accomplice Sara Francis AKA Denise Glasier AKA Denise Sullivan are believed to have been sales photos. The mother has been told by people associated with the traffickers and others that her son is dead but clings to the feeling and belief that Jonah is alive and can be found.


  •  Protesters want both the children returned to their mothers. Several religious groups are reaching out in prayer for Tammy Rief and Ruby Dillon and will be continuing to pray in their own religious communities, but Thursday night people of different religious backgrounds joined hands in prayer in solidity with these two mothers, who recently received recognition as “Mothers of the Year” from several human-rights-oriented organizations.Orange County has not been known for its activism but human rights activists say that the trafficking issue is something that will change that. Melanie Acosta note,”It unites people from all areas of the political spectrum and from across the various religious communities.”


The worst part of this case is that nobody in an official capacity is doing anything about this. Here is the contact information for the District Attorney along with the statutes that local police want filed as criminal charges against the father.

The local police want these charges filed against the father.

Lexi Dillon Case: What Caused An Expert to Change His Mind?


Lawyer Taking On OC Child Protective Services



Mothers of Lost Children Prayer Vigil Northern California with Jennifer Green http://www.gofundme.com/1yw9bk

Mothers of Lost Children Prayer Vigil Northern California with Jennifer Green http://www.gofundme.com/1yw9bk



Mothers of Lost Children

A case for Friendly Parenting and Shared Custody not being in the Best Interest of the Child


Photo: "Fathers who battered the mother are twice as likely to seek sole custody of their children as are non-violent fathers." - American Psychological Association</p><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /> <p>Forcibly taking a mother's children, and then controlling her emotionally by withholding contact must be publicly recognized as one of the greatest forms of 'mis-use' of the American justice system and one of the greatest hidden vehicles for wide-spread socially approved physical and emotional abuse and control. - Coral Anika Theill, Bonshea Making Light of the Dark</p><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /> <p>Posted by Coral Anika Theill<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /> Author, Advocate, Speaker & Reporter<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /> Memoir: BONSHEA Making Light of the Dark<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /> Website: www.coralanikatheill.com</p><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /> <p>The price for my own safety and freedom in 1996 was an imposed, unnatural and unwanted separation from my eight children. The injustice committed against me is not just the physical separation from my children, but the willful desecration of the mother-child relationship and bond, a sacred spiritual and emotional entity.

~American Psychological Association~(1996). Report of the APA Presidential Task Force on Violence and the Family , Washington, D.C.: Author.http://www.leadershipcouncil.org/1/res/cust_myths.html

When the presumptive rules of shared parenting overshadows the Best Interest of the child by violating Domestic Violence Protective orders and legislation, we must look under the covers to understand that this movement to share custody is the stepping stone to full custody for the abuser and a legal system that rewards the bully and benefits financially.


Many abusers use custody battles as way to seek control

When you think about it, it’s all about them. They’re doing this to hurt her. They’re hurting the children, and they don’t care.”

Domestic violence advocates say batterers sometimes use child custody proceedings as a way to continue to exert control.

“They can control so much of what happens to the children,” said Jackie Johnson, the children’s services supervisor for Harmony House. “They can make sure that when the children are with them there won’t be any boundaries. When you think about it, it’s all about them. They’re doing this to hurt her. They’re hurting the children, and they don’t care.”

Missouri is what’s considered a “friendly parent” state, meaning that state law tells judges to presume that joint custody is in the best interest of the child. Parents are supposed to share custody so that the child has “frequent, continuing and meaningful contact” with both parents.

But Kendall Seal, an attorney with Legal Services of Southern Missouri, said this language can lead to problems when there’s domestic violence.

“How can it be meaningful if the child is watching his mother being abused?” Seal asked. “There’s not a lot of discussion about what that means in terms of domestic violence.”

If the abusive parent successfully manipulates the court system…

“Victims of domestic violence can be made to appear less healthy and less stable in court, especially without legal counsel, which is a result of the abuse they have suffered,” Seal said. “Abusers capitalize on this appearance and present a cognitive frame to the court that they are the ‘responsible parent,’ and the victim is in fact mentally unstable and financially unwise. Far too often this results in abusers being given too much control over children and the non-abusive parent.”



Are Good EnoughParents Losing Custody to Abusive Ex-Partners?



Forcibly taking a mother’s children, and then controlling her emotionally by withholding contact must be publicly recognized as one of the greatest forms of ‘mis-use’ of the American justice system and one of the greatest hidden vehicles for wide-spread socially approved physical and emotional abuse and control.Coral Anika Theill, Bonshea Making Light of the Dark

Children are the silent victims of the family courts

In this Report –  FLAWED FACTOR FOR CHILD CUSTODY  by Margaret K. Dore

Margaret Dore addresses the  so-called “friendly parent” concept presents what seems to be a reasonable idea for the resolution of child custody disputes. Children are thought to do better when allowed or encouraged to maintain a close relationship with both parents. Therefore, custody should be awarded to the parent most likely to foster the child’s relationship with the other parent, i.e., the “friendly parent.”

The friendly parent concept is sometimes referred to as the friendly parent doctrine. It is codified in child custody statutes requiring a court to consider as a factor for custody, which parent is more likely to allow “frequent and continuing contact” with the child and the other parent, or which parent is more likely to promote the child’s contact or relationship
with the other parent.

What is most flawed in the system for Children of Domestic Violence Divorces are the cross purpose philosophies and indoctrination of Judges who put aside the rules of law to follow these doctrines that put children in danger.  With restraining orders Judges across the nation will disregard the protection of mother and child who are fleeing abuse to not only reestablish connections for the rights of the parent or the flawed belief that the connection between parent and child should take president over safety.

With so many judges giving shared custody to the batterer or identified molester,  how do you now share custody with the rapist…How do you friendly parent when your child begs you not to send them?

When Mothers strive to protect their children through the family court process they are commonly removed partially or completely from their children’s lives when reporting abuse.  Some 58,000 Child victims a year are taken from safe mothers and placed with known perpetrators. http://www.leadershipcouncil.org/1/med/PR3.html 

With so many conflicting doctrines and syndromes that supplant case law, Judges choose their favorite doctrine, or syndrome even when it may violate due process,  Domestic Violence and Child Safety.  This failure to protect by Judicial officers puts the non-offending mother in a no win position.  They are often dared to do the impossible, when child protective services and court professionals ignore evidence of abuse and disclosures. What’s a Mother to do?  Follow the orders that put the child in danger?  Risk Jail?  Run baby Run?  The very fact that the child is disclosing and refusing to go with the perpetrator gives reason for Judges to ignore common sense and rules of court 85% of the time by placing children in the home of the batterer.  Is it ignorance, arrogance or something much more sinister?  Do Judges still rely on recommendations from specialist and unscrupulous lawyers over Law and Current Trauma informed Training’s?




Exerting Masculinity – The fathers rights movement is dangerous to custody issues that involve Domestic Violence.

The Fathers’ Rights Movement Undermines Victims of Domestic Violence

A social movement that promotes equal rights for men who want to parent their children is essentially feminist. But the current fathers’ rights movement is not.

I could simply point to the fathers’ rights fringe groups, with their misogynist rants and close ties to the men’s rights movement, to make the case that the movement is not only anti-feminist but anti-women.

The utilization of equality and civil rights language does not change the underlying call for the reinstatement of patriarchy in the fathers’ rights movement. Harkening back to a time when men had near absolute control over children as property, activists advocate for male property rights that trump both the best interests of children and the safety of battered mothers.



The Boston Globe

Court rules in favor of father who abused ex-wife in custody case


I want my mommy

In 1994 Holly Collins became an international fugitive when she grabbed her three children and went on the run. It all happened because a family court had ignored Holly’s charges, the children’s pleas, Holly’s broken nose, Zackary’s fractured skull, and other medical evidence of domestic violence. The family court in Minnesota gave full custody of Zackary and Jennifer to Holly’s ex-husband. It was at that point that Holly came to believe she and the children had No Way Out But One.

In what has become an incredible saga, Holly eventually fled the United States. For awhile, she lived beneath the radar, hiding on Indian Reservations, in Mexico and Guatemala. With three children and no passports,incredibly, she made it to Amsterdam where she blurted out a plea for asylum. The fact that she was fleeing domestic violence and would not be protected if she were returned to the US seemed ridiculous at first. But Holly had come armed with documents – legal and medical. At first, she and her children were treated as refugees, living in a refugee center with other poor souls fleeing violence torn hell-holes from around the world. Living shoulder to shoulder with people learning to use indoor plumbing for the first time in their lives, Holly and her kids made the best of it. At least they were safe.

Holly became the first U. S. citizen to be granted asylum by the government of Netherlands. She lived a quiet, low profile life for the next 14 years, until the FBI agents came calling. Hoping to return Holly to the United States to face kidnapping charges, they interviewed her now grown children. Jennifer and Zackary told the agents that far from being their kidnapper, their mother was their savior and their hero.

Eventually, all charges against Holly were dropped, save one: contempt of court. Holly readily acknowledged that after all she and the children had been through, she did indeed harbor “contempt of court.”



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On the Ballot November 4 2014-

The North Dakota Parental Rights Initiative, Measure 6 is on the November 4, 2014 ballot in North Dakota as an initiated state statute. The measure, upon voter approval, would create a legal presumption that each parent in a child custody case is fit to parent, unless “clear and convincing evidence” demonstrates otherwise. Furthermore, the measure would give each parent in a custody case, unless one parent is proven unfit, equal parental rights and responsibilities, parenting time, primary residential responsibility and decision making responsibility of a child.[1] Measure 6 has also been referred to as the Fathers’ Rights Initiative.[2]

Shared Parenting and Father Rights Propaganda

Janie McQueen, Author and Divorce Gamesmanship Expert

Welcome to the “Shared Parenting” Showroom!

Welcome to the “Shared Parenting” Showroom!

Brought to you by the Fathers’ Rights Propaganda Rebranding Council


  • “Their main complaint in the past seems that “50/50 agreement” suddenly changes when the co-buyer decides he (we mean she, because with us, sorry, it’s usually the she who is at fault) is tired of sharing.”


  • “So we put an end to it. We just find ways to keep taking the bitches–we mean, mothers–we mean, co-buyers–to court and eventually, in the coolest switcheroo ever, manipulate the situation until she loses her dearest investment in life: her kids. (Like, did she really think we were gonna, you know, share the kids? Like, why would we do that? It makes no business sense whatsoever, to us, anyway. Money out of our pockets? Fuggetaboutit. Our mothers/new wives/foreign nannies are around to you know, wipe up after them and stuff. We just like to challenge the mothers’ wheedling about losing their kids by stating they’re withholding our own flesh and blood. You know–get the violins out. That usually does the trick–at least, the judges buy it. And that’s all that matters, right? P.S. What they really go for? When we talk about our shiny new 2-parent household! The ex can’t keep up her financial end? Bye-bye baby mama.)